I have a ritual on Christmas Eve that I’ve been doing for the last decade now, since escaping from unbearable extended-family-Christmas: I watch It’s a Wonderful Life, drink alone, get morose, and cry myself to sleep. It’s the one time a year I let myself just give in to the depression completely.
It’s not a good ritual. It’s mostly self-punishment and wallowing. And I was really hoping that this year I’d have a reason not to do it, but I don’t. Another year’s gone by, and I’m still lonely. I still hate being a lawyer. I’m still frustrated and worried and scared.
But for now, I have my ritual. “Hallelujah, Noel, be it heaven or hell: the Christmas we get, we deserve.”
Depression confuses me. I’m blessed in that I can’t relate to you, that I have no commonality with you here…but it’s times like this my pragmatic self-actualization proves to be narrow. I’m powerless to help you or anyone, and I hate it. All I can do is hold out hope that you will find happiness one day. I’m sorry.
The words “don’t be ashamed of what’s true” always stuck with me, no matter how much it fluctuated between nonsense and gospel. For some reason, I think of those words when I look at this picture. In any case, I like you very much and I pray you find the inner strength you need in the future.
PEOPLE WHO HAVE NEVER CONSIDERED SUICIDE CONFUSE ME
Anonymous
It’s funny you mention that! I actually sat in on a Crisis Intervention class, and the professor theorized that everyone does it to some extent. It could be a “Oh, it could be so much easier if I just faded away…” sentiment that could translate into a true suicidal mindset if left unaddressed. And it may stay unaddressed. I believe most everyone feels that way at least once in their life, cuz life sucks and all that over stuff that’s easily intuited.
Making PLANS for suicide that could easily come to fruition…that’s not normal. People like that confuse me because I can’t relate to that desire…it seems philosophically flawed. Maybe one day I will, but that’s not something I would assert with any eagerness.
So…yeah. People who never consider suicide confuse me too, because I don’t really believe they exist. XD
how confused where you the first time you played MINECRAFT?
Anonymous
…What? Huh? Who?
I never played Minecraft. I watched other people play it, but…who are you?! What made you think…
HUH?!
This I also approve.
This is vile. It goes against everything the brony community supposedly stands for. I happen to be both a furry and a Brony, I find this simply horrid. Especially that some sycophant would depict a FOAL committing such an act of violence.
i don’t talk to coke pony for this reason he thinks all furries should die and has said so on his blog. meanwhile he thinks it’s ok to sexualize ponies. news flash coke. it ain’t no different so enjoy being a self hater.
Bronies who think they aren’t furries on some level mystify me.
I’m aware of plenty of Furries who feel the same way about Bronies. Both sentiments really do fascinate me. There’s a clear cognitive disconnect between the two groups for some people…and this disconnect probably needs to be Loved and Tolerated. Or maybe they just need to forget about it and re-evaluate their priorities XD
WHERE IS IT?
HONEY, SERIOUSLY. YOU’RE NOT GOING TO FIND ANYTHING.
WHERE’S THE ZIPPER? OR IS IT A BATTERY COMPARTMENT? AN ON/OFF SWITCH? WHAT DO YOU HAVE?
A SCAR OR TWO. A BODACIOUS DERRIERE. THAT’S ABOUT IT.
NO ACTUAL BOYFRIEND REMEMBERS THE WEIRD BRITISH CANDIES I MENTIONED IN PASSING A MONTH AGO AND HAS A CASE OF THEM SHIPPED TO MY WORK WITH A CUTE LITTLE NOTE CARD. YOU’RE A ROBOT, OR AN ALIEN OR SOMETHING.
I JUST THOUGHT YOU MIGHT LIKE-
WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR? HOW MUCH ARE THEY PAYING YOU?
Big Macintosh
…Why? Am I doing something particularly interesting? Maybe my legs started doing a little dance without me noticing again. Or maybe you just don’t trust me. Or…
THERE’S SOMETHING ON MY BACK!
((I can’t say I haven’t lied or spilled someone’s secret before, but if you’d know what some tumblrs trust me with, you’d see how good I have become at keeping them a secret.))
The last thing I’d want to do is upset anypony. I’d keep whatever secret you entrusted to me. Granted, I’m a stranger…but at the same time, who better to tell?
(Source: eatm3th)
I’m as bad as VGCats
Don’t do that to yourself. NOBODY is as bad about updating as VGCats, with the possible exception of dead people.
This is fan-art someone made for me for a story I’m writing…and it happens to capture my inner dynamic quite well. Imagine these two living in my brain 24/7. Except with more talking and moving around.
When I envisioned this post, I did so as an exploration of the entire spectrum of quirks/traits/categorizations out there in the world (and maybe even for undiscovered traits). But I kept running across a problem: personality, predictably, confuses me. I’ve analyzed the spectrum so many times that I don’t know what it means anymore. So what I’ve decided is simply to explore my own. Maybe then I can present myself to people as something simpler/more complex than “I am what I am”. Maybe then I’ll be brave enough to seek people out just enough to get what I need from those I revere…to actually be a part of their lives in a way I like instead of in a way I tolerate.
About Things Confuse Me
